The fucktard from the power company

[L] Strong Language: This blog may not be suitable for all visitors. Some material may contain sensitive subject matter including adult language. Thank you.


Okay Gang, so I went to enter my first post when the following event occurred in my own personal life and I couldn’t help letting it skip ahead since it’s was perfect for this venue. You’ll soon read why. I’m so damn excited about this blog and its launch but the farther I seem to go, the behinder I get. One of the reasons I started this blog in the first place is the many rants racing around my head that really need a place “to be.” To be nurtured and cared for and whatever. Hey, if Oprah can do it so can I, even if I have to pay a couple of bucks to do it. My point is, and I do have one like Ellen DeGeneres made it a point to say and titling one of her books by that very name, is that I have many ideas slated for this blog’s site and this one decided to cut ahead in line, all on it’s own. Just yesterday. Here’s what happened to me and my family:

As I called for him/her after he/she rang the doorbell, he/she just kept on walking with his/her back turned to me and never gave me the time of day. I could tell this was an act of aggressive behavior because I know this person could hear me. The androgynous figure from Met Ed with their back facing me acknowledged my presence but kept walking. I suppose it’s just in their job description to simply keep walking and avoid any confrontation regardless of any circumstances whatsoever even though they ring your doorbell so you’ll come to fetch the paperwork left wedged in the door handle. I also suppose they’re told their customers should be treated no better than street dogs or laboratory mice and the likes. This, my friends, is a commentary of what’s known as the despicable practice of due process on the part of our public utility commissions.

Well it is sure funny how eager they [the power companies] are to take your money and turn power off for non-payment over a whopping $272.84 total balance due, yet when you want to explain there’s a person with a disability living on the premises, well then they just don’t have the time of day for you.

Why? Most likely because they’re too busy running off to the next poor victim of the economy, rather the DEPRESSION and turn off their power. Oh yes, you heard me right. A DEPRESSION. THIS IS A DEPRESSION despite what those in our nation’s capitol have done to revamp the system by convincing us otherwise and continuing to call it a recession. But that’s a matter I’ll take up on another day when I’m really in a mood to go head to head.

Now please indulge me as I explain a few things before we get to your comments. My husband pays this particular bill and paying bills is not one of his strong suits. Clearly. His attitude is, “Oh well, shit happens. We’ll just fix it.” Whereas mine is, “Helloooooooo, have we met? I’m Mr. O-C-D. THIS DIDN’T NEED TO HAPPEN!” So he [my husband] calls the power company to arrange full payment of the full outstanding balance and to explain the whole ‘disabled’ thing in the hope it would speed up the restoration. Once again Glinda thinks it’s amusing how quickly the power company moves when taking money but so slow to restore the power. Well Glinda is here to warn you all not to keep hope alive when it comes to power companies and a speedy restoration because it was over 21 hours before a different field rep came by to turn the power back on. I think we all know what over 21 hours of non-electric-Amish-style-good-old-fashioned-may-as-well-sit-with-your-thumb-up-your-ass-21-hours feels like, don’t we? I know y’all are now getting used to my style and wit, but that’s whatchya call rhetorical. So don’t bother to answer that one. Well karma’s a bitch, power companies, and it comes and goes for everyone and everything.

Now for the good part of the story… The very next day, Glinda is up bright and early after a long night of darkness, waiting for the arrival of the merry, faithful, humble and obedient servant of the Lord of the Douches. (Of which there are many. We have all met many along our journey. But I digress.) As quickly as I can, I summon his attention. And this time Glinda has him in her clutches. So like Dr. Seuss‘ little Cindy Lou Who, I said meekly unto him, “Why didn’t you stop when I called for you yesterday,” actually using an even-tone as not to scare the creature away since my work with him wasn’t quite over.

Well the story has a happy and a not-so-happy ending. The not-so-happy ending being I practically begged the second rep who came to restore my service to find out the name of the person who treated me so poorly so I could report them by name to their supervisor. Let’s face it, in all actuality I wanted it for the purpose of this blog post but who’s to say. That fucktard is the one that couldn’t take one minute from his/her day to answer my question or two about how to resolve my dilemma and prevent it from happening in the future considering there’s a person with a disability living in the house. And if he had been the one to come back that next day, I would have said my peace and concluded our business by saying, “Now be off with you or I’ll simply cut the power of your manhood from between your legs. NOW GET OFF MY PROPERTY!”

Well, in my glindalistic world I kinda sorta wish it went that way, but I do have a reputation to uphold after all, or do I? I don’t care as long as the truth and nothin’ but the truth gets out. And the message in all of this is treat people with dignity because we don’t all mean to be in these predicaments sometimes. Like my husband says, sometimes shits happens. And one day shit just might come back to the fucktard at the power company and Glinda help his soul because as All-Star Survivor Susan Hawk said to her fellow contestants, some of the people we share our planet with act like vultures, snakes and rats. And all I can say to you, Fucktard, is “NO WATER FOR YOU!”

Again, for you girls whose wives, husbands, or significant others forte is not bill paying, I can relate. Hopefully they make up for it in other parts of your relationship if you know what I mean, wink, wink. And if they don’t, THEN KICK ‘EM TO THE CURB! What the hell are they good for! Take a piece of advice from yours truly and let me ask you a question, “What are you, there for? To be their mommy?” Glinda don’t play that game.

As Glinda’s glistening bubble readies to ascend her swiftly to the skies above until the next post, I say thank you power companies, near and far, for your patience and willingness to help those who are truly at the and of their rope searching for the light at the end of the tunnel that thankfully we didn’t have to pay to drive through like the Lincoln or Holland Tunnels in the Great State of New Jersey from which I hail (or should I say Oz… oops, ‘my bad.) Or maybe we already have.

Now onward with your comments, my faithful readers.

Ta ta for now,


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15 Responses to The fucktard from the power company

  1. Laura Lee says:

    I’m OCD too and no that didn’t need to happen! Laura Lee who thinks she’s Glinda too so watch out!

  2. George says:

    Strange, I just received my METED bill and it was higher than I expect it. so I went to technology and online it said I hadn’t paid last month and that the total was due normal time this month. So what did I do…I paid the whole thing. That’s right, no one showed up at my door, no one turned the electric off. I have had tenants in my houses who have gone over 6 months without paying their bill which was several thousand dollars, and they never got turned off. I’m thinking it is Glinda. they just wanted to give you something to bitch about.
    As far as the man refusing to come speak to you. Think about it…. his job is to serve notice. He has no idea what type of person you are. I’m sure he runs into folks who would take it out on him and hurt him. If you do not think so, just watch a reality show such as the guys working for landlords in California. These guys run into the worst people and they are crazy. How about the repo guys. Even though they give people a chance to win their car back (low lifes) they still get nasty.
    Do you think that guy who turns the electric off gets paid enough to deal with people who don’t pay their bills??? Get real 🙂

    • George,

      Glinda always keeps it real. If you read my post, George, you should have been able to deduce that what struck a chord with me was the representative’s lack of respect to acknowledge my presence and empathy as a human being. Capisce? And yes, I have seen the reality shows of which you refer to in your rant, but again I remind you it’s all quite irrelevant in relationship to my experience because I expressed no acts of aggression whatsoever. I was merely looking for human interaction which is what the post was about in the first place and the lack thereof in the world.

      THEREFORE, my wand has been waved and you have been served. Have a glindaliscious day!

  3. Roseanna says:

    Hi Glinda, I can relate how you feel. People in general are getting meaner and meaner. There is no common decency anymore. A complete lack of respect. Its called cause and effect….they cause the problem…..then the effect after I get through with them…well then they wonder where that came from…well I say learn how to talk to people….or don’t work with the public…I am woman hear me roar….

  4. bonju says:

    Hey G/N – this is C Haig. You’re blog is the hoot! Reading.

    • What what, Jayne Dough? What a fucking original name. Did you buy it at the Dollar Store? What are you talking about? And please try to use proper English when writing me so I can understand you especially if you insist on contacting me using a flimsy moniker. You’re what I call a coward. At least my moniker is just for fun and amusement. What’s your excuse? Now quick… run along and fetch yourself a dictionary and look up moniker.

      P.S. Note: First time offenders don’t have their messages posted to the blog just in case it was an error on your part and I owe you an apology, which I don’t feel this was. But if so, please write me and we can become friends if you like. At least then I’ll know you’re a legitimate reader or better yet, a fan. HOWEVER, if not, REPEAT OFFENDERS HAVE THEIR MESSAGES POSTED FOR ALL TO READ AND TO BE SHAMED AS THEY SHOULD BE. BE WARNED MY PRETTY… You have no power here! Begone, before somebody drops a house on you, too!

  5. jayne says:

    What a shame? Your family had to go through 21 hours with no electricity. Poor babies. (Emphasis on babies). Get a hold of yourself, G! You were in no danger, just a little discomfort. This so-called ***tard, (excuse me but as a rational adult I don’t feel the need to use vulgarity), was merely doing his/her job as he/she was trained to do. They are not there to explain to you that if you don’t pay your bills on time there will be a consequence. Non-payment= non-service. Furthermore he/she is NOT 100% sure if the dead-beat, uh, I mean late paying customer, is a well meaning, albeit forgetful person, or a homicidal psychopath concealing a weapon, be it a Glock or a flour-laden rolling pin. He/ she is trained not to confront customers in order to avoid any dangerous situations. He/she just wants to do their job and go home to their families at the end of the day. Safe. And you with your silly, nonsensical ranting and raving to his/her superior want them to be fired. (Then of course tarred and feathered). Why? Because he/she upset the G household by not explaining the do’s and don’ts of bill-paying to every Tina, Dorothy, and Hilary they come across every day of their working lives. If everyone would stop trying to place blame and take responsibility for their own actions, or, in this case inaction, this country would be headed in the right direction. Now put all the bills in one box, and pay your debts. ON TIME!!!

    Ta ta for blah, blah, blah!!!

    • And you, the minuscule and worthless piece of crap that lay beneath shit,

      If you don’t like what you read, then leave my blog and don’t come back! GOOD RIDDANCE! Get a life, get a grip, and get in touch with reality. It happens, you SCUNTARD! The fact the bill wasn’t paid was an oversight, you ASSHOLE. Maybe you are the deadbeat as it would take one to know one. My readers and fan base will enjoy this post. And you can guarantee I’ll be posting the reply to this private email to the blog as well. Perhaps I’ll feature this rant in a post of its own which is what I do best, Jaaayne… right? When I give it the fair amount of time it deserves, you’ll be Andy Cohen’s favorite “Jackhole of the Week!”

      Good evening and good riddance you DDDDouchebag! No, I didn’t stutter. I wanted to emphasize the word and yes, I kiss my mother with these lips. And I kissed yours with them last night too!


      P.S. Now look… enough of this nonsense you fucktard! I'm getting ready to go out with friends who don't like this kind of silliness from jackholes. You probably don't have friends so I suggest you just go to bed. NOW BITCH! I'll check my phone and reply if I must, but please stop wasting my time or I'll just block you so I don't have to deal with your shit.
      P.P.S. Learn how to curse. It's fun and God really doesn't care, Pussy! She told me so. Now fuck off!!!

  6. jaynedough says:

    Now, now Mr. Potty Mouth, I see a nerve has been struck. You wouldn’t want to block me in any way because this is becoming the most interesting content you have on this ridiculous site. Or will this become a one-way site where you inundate us with your silly viewpoints and not let anyone respond with anything you find will make your way of thinking look wrong.
    First of all, Mr. Elitist, knower of all English words, old and new, great and small, don’t mistake my humble disposition for cowardice. I would not say your abrasive demeanor is a character flaw, just different from mine. The reason I keep my anonymity is my business and has nothing to do with bravery, or the lack thereof. You might even find it respectable.
    The way you conduct yourself is quite evident in the way you write, and anyone reading your meaningless diatribes can tell the difference between a serious writer and a wanna-be poser. I do believe I am using that new slang word correctly. If not, I’m sure you will no-doubt correct me. Again, I’m not saying that is a character flaw, just different than mine. (Correcting everyone’s use of the English language, or condescendingly directing them to a dictionary, does not make you smarter than everyone else; it just shows what you will stoop to, attempting to put yourself, in your own mind, above everyone else, intellectually). For your information NO ONE IS BUYING IT.
    I tend to equate bullying with cowardice, whether it is physical, oral or written. By the looks of your video content you could not be a physical bully, so I will assume your bullying is hidden behind a phone or pen (keyboard).
    You weave a tapestry of foul-language filled sentences unmatched by anyone I have had the misfortune of corresponding with. To me that shows the maturity of your character, whether you warn us about it on your blog or not.
    If you do kiss your mother with that mouth I’m sure she doesn’t realize how you are using it outside of her presence, or she would, (should) wash it out with industrial soap and steel wool. Regular soap and water would not suffice.

    Ta Ta for Blah, Blah, Blah.

    P.S. By the way, not paying a bill is still not paying a bill. Every deadbeat uses ‘oversight’ as an excuse. Stop making excuses and own up to it, G.

    P.S.S. I have never been late on any payment my entire life. My recent credit score, perhaps 3 weeks ago as per a credible source, was 787. What’s yours, big mouth?
    I dare you to post this, YOU COWARD!!!


      In your most recent reply you stated my blog is “one-way”. I think you should hire a fact checker, Bitch, because that’s not what happened here. I posted your replies to my blog for the world to see as I warned ahead of time I would do based on the comment you wrote. AND, I might add. Readers of my blog are forewarned in the About tab and that if they don’t like what they read then to simply leave and not return.

      And yes, this too shall be posted, so keep it comin’ Bitch! Let me tell you something, you dirty little skank-ass-whore-bitch that you are! Do you know who you are — because I do. You are beyond transparent and lack regard for both the English language and intelligence. Do you understand me you little slunt?


      And please do try to be more original with own closings, CUNT!

      GLINDA (And I’ll have you know my nerves remain very much intact, spank you very much!)

      P.S. I hope you’re keeping up with my blog, especially your comments. I’m sending out an eblast to my GTGB Elite Distribution List tonight thanks to all the fun we’re having. Ta ta for now, Bitch!

      P.P.S. Okay, I’ve called your dare. Big fuckin’ deal. And you’re credit score was 787 from a credible source three weeks ago. From who, your piece of shit mutha? That could change tomorrow you moron! Let me give you a quarter and you can tell someone who actually gives a shit.

      P.P.P.S. Are you so Goddess-like you’ve never made an oversight. By the way, I didn’t make the “oversight” myself. If you truly read the post, it was made by my husband. And even he who is very busy because we who have lives unlike you, scrunt, make an occasional oversight. We are NOT DEADBEATS like you.

      P.P.P.P.S. And last but not least unless you wish to keep this going because I live for this, my darling turd who only thinks she has met her match. Here’s a little lesson on how to use post scripts: P.S. or PS. or in the past few cases, P.P.S. (post-post-scriptum, or postquam-post-scriptum) and PPPS (post-post-post-scriptum, and so on, ad infinitum) are used, though only PPS has somewhat common usage.PPS (post-post-scriptum, or postquam-post-scriptum) and PPPS (post-post-post-scriptum, and so on, ad infinitum) are used, though only PPS has somewhat common usage.

  7. jayne says:


    1st- Your credit rating could not be near 800, just for the fact that you failed to pay the one bill you admitted to not paying on time yourself. So that makes you a DAMNED LIAR. Remember ‘THOU SHALT NOT LIE’. Let’s keep it real G. Your real educated readers know this.

    2nd- The ‘about tab’ warning your readers of your content does not excuse you from exhibiting the sophomoric poison you spew.

    3rd- Your question was” Do you understand me you little slunt?”
    ‘What is a slunt?’ Oh, a typo. Gee, I make those errors too, sometimes.
    Just because a pss was typed instead of a pps, why must you point these meaningless errors out, when you make them yourself? Open mouth-insert foot.

    4th- Are you really attacking my use of your salutations??? Keep grasping at those straws, G.

    Ta Ta for blah,blah,blah…

    PS- I want to assure your readers, my claimed credit score is true and your claim of your credit score is false. Come on G. Fess up.
    PPS- A person like yourself have to remind everyone the ‘oversight ‘was not on your part, but your husband’s.’ Like I said before,” Pass the blame G. Don’t accept any responsibility for your (household’s “) actions (inactions). But complain when those inactions prove to cause appropriate consequences. You both are part of the same team. Don’t assess blame, accept it.
    PPPS- Your statement was ‘We are NOT DEADBEATS like you and you poser-clients truly are.’ Oh, another grammar typo? Gee, I make those errors too, sometimes. Obviously not as often as you. And I rarely point them out. Wow-déjà vu. See 4th point. How does your foot taste? Familiar by now, I would guess?

    PPPPS- If you live for this, YOU SHOULD GET A REAL LIFE.
    PPPPPS-see 4th. Re: typo.
    PPPPPS- Are the post-scripts correct and in the right order, G?
    I think a lot of your readers think you have met your match. Why don’t you ask them?

    • Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. Well Jayne, look who’s resorted to name-calling? YOU! You little fucktard. Listen and listen up since we’re all getting tired of you’re bullshit around here. Frankly, I could do this forever because I live for it. I was designed for it. But my peeps come here for fun and NOT FOR THE LIKES OF YOU. So go elsewhere because after this post we’re all washing our hands of you. Your last comment has proved several things to us all. You are not coherent. You don’t present your facts well since you proved over and over again you do not read my posts thoroughly and the list goes on and on. But I have decided to no longer approve your comments simply based on the fact that your are a miserable female woman, a.k.a. a SCUNT. The worst cunt of them all. That’s right Jayne Dough, you ignorant scunt. You heard me. You are banished from my queendom from now until the end of time. Your comments no longer count here. You called me a DAMNED LIAR and subsequently asked me to remember a quote from the Bible, “THOU SHALT NOT LIE.”

      Firstly, I NEVER LIED, Janye. Every word in my posts is true and verifiable. If you read the post, in it I stated my husband never paid the bill. YOU assumed the bill was in MY name which it isn’t. Second of all, utility bills are NOT reported to the credit bureaus YOU ASSHOLE, unless as far as I know, they have been abandoned. YOU should get YOUR facts straight and hire yourself a fact checker you fucking dingbat! I think you have some helluva nerve insulting my “real educated” readers with all the assumptions you make. But then again, none of it surprises me coming from you.

      Now let’s see, the next item on your list concerns my sophomoric poison. Well, it does very, very nicely for me and my demographic begs to differ with you. So suck on that and spew it out your ass. But thank you for obviously taking the time to navigate my blog.

      Your third point, though debatable, well let’s just say you know the answer to this so stop toying with me and cut the shit. Enough is enough. Battles and wars are mine to be won every time. EVERY TIME.

      Moving on to number four and in an effort to avoid redundancy, I will ask that you refer to the previous email sent to you below. It contains my explanation regarding my coined word “slunt.” You see, THERE WAS NO TYPO as you accused me of and I DID NOT INSERT MY MOUTH IN MY FOOT, BUT YOU DID! Why don’t you tell me how it tasted, Darlin’. Don’t you think someone owes someone an apology, Jayne? But I’m certain I’ll never get one since you’re too small to offer one. In fact, whereas the energy at my forum is meant to bring about awareness while poking some fun at the same time, it appears you on the other hand, are full of hatred. What some might call a hatemonger.

      As for your point five: My, my, my… You are the one grasping at straws, Darling! And, the fun just goes on and on. What you meant to say was “closings” Sweetie, the word is closings, NOT salutations. A salutation is used in the beginning of a letter or email or correspondence when addressing the recipient. Now that we’ve cleared that up and given you something to ponder, let’s move on to your next error in judgment. I’m not the one in attack mode. You wrote in to the blog. I’m merely being a good host by replying. And lastly with regard to this point, you’re the one doing all the “grasping,” a clear indication you need to get laid. So Ta ta for blah, blah, blah yourself in your dirty vagina.

      Notations Regarding Jayne Dough’s Post Scripts:
      P.S. No one gives a shit about your lousy credit score, whether it’s true or not. Or, who you really are.
      P.P.S. Once again your typing skills leaves much to be desired. The word “have” in the first sentence should be “has”. Cheese and rice! Learn how to type already. As far as passing blame goes: There was no blame to pass. My husband didn’t pay the bill, therefore it was his oversight. We are two independent people, each with our own responsibilities at home. That is what a partnership is, Jayne, you fucking turdball! What don’t you understand about that, Jayne? And no one said I didn’t accept it. (By the way, take a good look at the pitiful lack of punctuation on your part in your comment. Can you say “night school” or “GED” Jayne?) I was just having some fun writing about it and expressing my points of view that having nothing to do with all this nonsense. Of course, being the schizophrenic and bipolar personality that I suspect you are, you only see things the way your delusional mind wants to see them.
      P.P.P.S. What typo? I don’t see a typo? This is my blog Bitch, I don’t see a typo. Do you? Poof! It’s gone! The way you soon will be.
      P.P.P.P.S. I love what I do and incidentally, I’ve had an amazingly colorful life to boot! It sounds like you’re the one who desperately needs to GET A LIFE. I’ll send you a dollar if you send me your address and that’ll give you a start!
      P.P.P.P.P.S. Now you’re just babbling and becoming more incoherent. I suspect you’re either off your medication or started nipping excessively at the alcohol. GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, GIRL!
      P.P.P.P.P.S. You were fine with the post scripts until this last one. Do you see how you never added an additional “P.”? I suspect it was the meds or booze or both. Oh for goodness’ sake, what are we going to do with you, Jayne?

      Finally, you are no match for this bitch. You never will be. However, don’t despair. My fans are not laughing at you (at least I hope not) and please take solace in knowing we pity you. We feel sad for you. And please don’t return. Ever.

      Jayne, YOU HAVE BEEN SERVED. Goodbye, Jayne, and good riddance. Now you, Jayne Dough, like the typo that didn’t really exist in your worthless P.P.P.S. are gone. POOF!


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